Sunday, August 10, 2014

Let Them Eat Cake (As Long As They Cover Their Plate)

Dear Overly Opinionated Planner,

My wedding cost $120 a head and everybody seemed to have a great time. We got some awesome gifts and almost everything on our registry was purchased. Winning! Unfortunately one of our guests who we thought was a close friend, only gave us a card with $50 cash. I am so insulted! Everybody knows that your gift is supposed to cover the cost of your plate, now I’m out $70.

I feel like I should approach her to let her know how rude her gift is.

How would you go about this?

Kind regards,


Dear Insulted,

Dear, dear, dear. From here on in I will refer to your as Miss Money-Grubber.

Let me answer this as simply as I possibly can, Miss Money-Grubber, because I expect you have a short attention span and may get distracted by something expensive and shiny at any second.

IT IS NOT YOUR GUESTS FAULT THAT YOU CAN’T AFFORD YOUR OWN WEDDING, nor is it their job to cover the cost of their plate. Too bad, so sad. You should have considered your budget before you booked that hot pink hummer and rhinestone encrusted garter to wear under your mullet dress (I’m just assuming your wedding was as tacky as your attitude).

Furthermore, your friend’s financial situation is none of your business. It is possible that is all she could afford, although I prefer to believe that it’s all she thought you deserved, as I’m sure this is not the first time your true Bridezilla nature has reared its ugly, 3 eyed, scaly head. In fact, she probably thought you deserved nothing, but being the truly lovely and classy lady she is, she took the high road and gave you a perfectly adequate amount of cash and a lovely card.  

I suggest rather than approaching your friend and telling her her gift was rude, you in fact go to her and beg her to teach you some manners and decorum. If your friend is reading this, I suggests she charges you exactly $50 for the lesson.

I hope this helped Miss Money-Grubber, and may you have a long and happy life with all your gifts.


The Overly Opinionated Planner 

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